Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Just Something to Liven Up your Day

This has nothing to do with either SU or Wildtree. I just thought it was funny and had to share.

HOW TO TICK PEOPLE OFF

  1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
  2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."
  3. Specify that your drive-through order is "TO-GO."
  4. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
  5. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
  6. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
  7. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think."
  8. Practice making fax and modem noises.
  9. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc" them to your boss.
  10. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
  11. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
  12. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears and grimacing.
  13. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.
  14. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
  15. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
  16. Staple pages in the middle of the page.
  17. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a croaking noise.
  18. Honk and wave to strangers.
  19. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints at the cash register.
  20. TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
  21. type only in lowercase.
  22. dont use any punctuation either
  23. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
  24. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times.
    "DO YOU HEAR THAT?"
    "What?"
    "Never mind, it's gone now."
  25. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
  26. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "No, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
  27. Ask people what gender they are.
  28. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
  29. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
  30. Sing along at the opera.
  31. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
  32. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Blog Winners Found

I have found the blog candy winners, or should I say, they found me. The "candy" will be mailed out tomorrow. One will get the Punch Bunch from Sale-A-Bration and the other Happy Moments from Sale-A-Bration. They will also get another surprise from me since it took so long. The winners were Judy Jackson from PA and the other winner was Kathy McCloskey from WA. Hope you girls enjoy.

Monday, February 14, 2011

Blog Winners

I am still looking for the blog winners I emailed way back around Christmas. I want to send you your goodies. I know there was a tie.

Monday, February 7, 2011

SORRY!

I AM BACK. But I am sorry I did not fulfill my obligations to the winners. If you could let me know who you were, I will send the items out this week. My life has been crazy and I have not done any stamping in quite a while except for going to a demo friend of mine's workshop. I am really out of the loop. I am really sorry I let you all down.

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